A Shifting Perspective of Life with Disability
This blog short originally appeared on Instagram. Follow me at @disabledinthewild7
The first photo was taken in March of 2016, a few days before my first appointment with my CIRS doctor.
I returned to this spot with forearm crutches three years later in March of 2019. I remember celebrating my progress and thinking that maybe in another three years, I would be able to come back to this spot without any mobility aids.
The last photo is from last weekend, March 2022. On the way there, I considered not taking a picture, because I'm still using the forearm crutches and therefore, "nothing" has changed.
But when we arrived at the garden, I wasn't focused on wishing my legs were different or wondering if I'll ever walk unassisted again. You know what I did think about? I thought about how using a wheelchair for trips like this would help reduce unnecessary pain and would have allowed me to go around the whole loop. Just because I can use my legs, doesn't mean I have to use them- not if it means causing excessive pain for several days afterward. I thought about how there are no benches in this garden, which would have helped me stay longer, go farther, and enjoy myself more. Benches would benefit so many people, and I thought about how I should reach out to the owners and ask what I could do to help them raise money for benches. I thought about how the walking path has obstacles that may make it difficult for some people to traverse safely, and how I should take pictures to post on Google so that other Disabled people know what to expect when they get there.
By the time we got to the statue, I realized how much had changed: my outlook, my goals, my priorities, my feelings about my disabilities, and the profound feeling of being part of a community.
I don't want to spend my life wishing things were different. I want to enjoy my life no matter what it looks like. I want to support my body the way it needs to be supported- not push through at any cost. I want to support my community too. In a world that so often leaves Disabled folks behind to fend for ourselves, I want to be the one who shows up.
And that’s when I realized that living well with disabilities doesn't mean ignoring them or pretending they don’t exist. Living well with disabilities means leaning in.
About a month after I wrote this post, I began to write reviews for local outdoor spaces. Check out the story here: www.disabledinthewild.com/blog/why-im-writing-reviews-for-local-outdoor-spaces
